Crisis in the Cinematic Universe

I’m taking this news badly, by the way. What i found out yesterday has left a nasty taste in my mouth and i’m afraid i’m about to wax lyrical about my discontentment…

A recent blog post spoke of the HBOmax TV show “Peacemaker”, and how i enjoyed it’s violent action, witty script and subtly rounded characterisation. I even, if i recall, spoke very highly of its direction – provided skillfully by James (Guardians of the Galaxy) Gunn. I thought i was happy, pleased with the geek world and its various forms. I found myself revering Gunn himself…

And then it all came crashing down. I was betrayed. My fan instincts were torn asunder and i was full of trivial hate and anger.

To understand the full picture of my despair, i must tell you of a few things. Firstly, let us address a Netflix show, of which i am also a fan. Its called “The Witcher” – you may have heard of it. Its the story of Geralt of Rivia, an outcast monster-hunter with silver hair, yellow eyes and the acting range of a Larch. His expletive utterances and grunts are a source of pop memes the world over. His strikingly monosyllabic dialogue have earned him many fans. That, and the fact that women and men alike find him startlingly handsome. He is Henry Cavill, british actor who has played the son of Edmund Dantes, the unwanted suitor of Clare Danes, an immortal demigod, Sherlock Holmes and even Napoleon Solo. He missed out to Daniel Craig as Bond. So the stars were in alignment when he secured the role of the best superhero of all. Clark Kent. Superman.

However, due to rumoured creative differences – the word is the Witcher’s writers want to take the show in a different direction than the books – and Cavill is off, to be replaced by one of the non-Thor Hemsworths. Fans are in uproar. A petition has already been signed by nearly half a million people to have the writers fired and Cavill reinstated.

But the fans were compensated. A surprise cameo of Supes himself at the end of the recent Rock vehicle Black Adam, followed by a media message from Cavill…Superman was to return. A sequel / follow up to Snyder’s Man of Steel was in the works. I’m sure i wasnt the only person that leaped for joy.

My happiness was short lived.

Merely days later there came a shockwave through the industry. It began with the news that Wonder Woman 3 was shelved. Batgirl has been lost to time. And…the recently announced Superman movie was now in the trash pile. We weren’t going to get Henry Cavill in the cape again after all. Nor we going to get Geralt of Rivia with his dreamy demon eyes.

James Gunn has sledgehammered the DC Universe. It looks as if the entire justice league are fated to their doom. The troubled Flash movie is apparently still happening, as is Aquaman’s sequel, and thankfully we’re still getting Robert Pattinson’s second Batman movie. But no more Batman Beyond (with michael keaton!)!

Theres almost no consolation. Oh apparently there is another Superman, with a younger clark kent. But no henry cavill.

I am a great fan of Christopher Reeve. A hero and a role model. I loved Brandon Routh, my superman. I’ve met the man and we’ve posed as Captain Cold and The Atom. I was retiscent to accept Cavill’s new, darker Superman… but i did. And now he’s been taken from me.

I ask the world; if you’re going to do this to me, give me Man from Uncle 2…

Its not all doom and gloom. We’re getting a Warhammer movie in the future, and i just read a rumour that he’s in the reboot of Highlander. WHAT? WHY AM I HEARING ABOUT THIS NOW!!!


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